She

It's not here. And I have to find it.

At every rough spot over the past few years, I've randomly opened to a page in this book and it has told me EXACTLY what I needed to hear.

I was given the gift when leaving a job a few years back by a coworker. We were not close, but she looked at me on my last day and said, "This will define you for the rest of your life. You are a brave person and you need to remind yourself of that at times."

The book is called SHE and it's just a nice little empowering book of a poem. But it tells me things when I need to hear them.

I haven't thought about this book in months (it's got to be around here someplace!!), ever since I moved from the old house to this little one in January. I used to keep it on my desk, I even had extra copies in the closet to give to female friends. But somewhere, somehow it was packed and sits in a box someplace.

I NEED IT TONIGHT.

I wish I had been more careful with it. Like the magic 8-ball, I ask it a question and it gives me an answer. A real answer. An empowering answer. Close eyes, ask question, open book - wa-lah!

Scarlet made a comment on my previous blog that resonated deeply (You will feel it in your gut if you're meant to cross that bridge or not. When you feel that staying behind is not an option, you might even jump if you can't cross it! Trust me on this one.) and it made me remember my old friend. Where did I PUT IT...?

My favorite page said, "She stepped out on a branch, it broke off behind her, and she discovered she could fly" - followed by "Celebrate her courage". I feel like the cowardly lion today. This is such a big leap... I could use a little courage.

I wish I could ask it that question today. "What do I have to be afraid of?" All of the other paths won't work for me anymore. I have to choose the one that makes me happy. I'd love a little moment of inspiration in the form of a silly poem that always and forever makes me feel like I have nothing to fear.

It is seriously time to clean the garage.